Finding my Purpose as a New Wife

Sunday, 18 September 2016

I remember when I first became a wife, I faced an identity crisis. I was used to be independent, and pursuing my goals and dreams. But as us two became one, I started losing sight that I too was created for purpose. 

I felt called to come alongside Josh in life overseas for his ministry + career in basketball. Initially, it sounds so alluring- travel- something I've always wanted... An athletes wife- sounds incredible right?!

It is. In so many ways. 
The gift of travel is not one I ever will take for granted. 

But the isolation, the loneliness and lack of purpose that became familiar companions in our first year overseas was NOT expected.

But there they were.
5 day road trips, alone.
Players-only events and parties, alone.
The loneliness crept in and I felt jealousy + bitterness try to spread roots.

As these feelings surfaced, I immediately shared with Josh how his purpose, his ministry, his job + community through his job were causing me to become frustrated, jealous and bitter. 

So we began to pray. 
We prayed for community no matter where we traveled.
We prayed for purpose no matter where we lived.
We prayed for ministry, no matter what the platform. 
We prayed for financial provision; 1.5 years ago we were 40k deep in student loan debt.

In time, God answered. 
In typical Courtney fashion- I didn't like the answer initially. 
Online fitness coaching?? 

Come on God- we all know that's a scam- I'm not a salesperson, I'm not even good at eating healthy! How on earth could THIS be my calling? 

But he kept calling- in true God-fashion.
He brought it up in conversation.
He brought it up on social media.
He was loud + clear. 
The answer is was seeking was right there- but it was my choice to choose obedience + faith over my insecurities + misassumptions.

So I said yes.
And today, I sit in an apt having lived in 5 different countries in just 1 year with this job as my constant in a tumultuous life. 

Coaching is so much more to me than bootcamps. 
So much more to me than getting abs or being "goals".
It's about changing lives. It's about changing MY life.
It's about community that sticks with me through every season I encounter- prayer answered. 
It's about purpose- getting up every morning with a REASON... That I have a REASON for life that goes far beyond waking up and turning Netflix on- prayer answered. 
It's about ministry- having more women+girls reach out to me because something I shared or posted on social media has RADICALLY rocked them for the better-prayer answered.
It's about provision-financial provision, no matter where we live where I was able to covers my monthly student loan payments and one day in the future financially pay for me to stay home with our babies.

THAT is unbelievable. 
That something I was so AFRAID of doing, I was so SKEPTICAL of doing almost kept me from taking advantage of an opportunity God put in front of me that literally transformed my life answering 3 huge prayers for me. 

Friends don't be me. 
Don't let your fears or doubts or skepticism keep YOU from taking part in something that is life-changing. 
God may be answering your prayers- but we've got to be clues into how he's speaking in and around us. 

If you feel like I'm speaking to YOU...if you feel like you want the same things I wanted but you've been unsure or afraid of taking that next step... Please message me. I promise you, you won't regret taking advantage of a job like mine- coaching isn't for the perfect. It's for the messy, the purposeless, the bad eaters, the friendless, the isolated, the lonely, the wannabe stay at home mommas, the in-debt graduate... It's for the needy. 

Message me. Let's just chat about you.

1 comment:

  1. Courtney, What a great post.. It spoke so much to me.. and the process we all seem to walk through as we take on new adventures and challenges. I am in year 9 of being married and we have 5 beautiful children. We moved to CA last year and very quickly found beautiful friends and a wonderful church.. but, being a stay at home mom with lots of littles is very isolating and I have found myself discouraged, weak and forming bad habits. I have come to realize that it starts with me.. and from there my husband and little ones are strengthened too! I am similar to you in that I tend to jump into things full on.. but, over the last few years I have learned to be more selective. (to really prioritize) I am coming more and more to a place where I believe it has to start first with our hearts.. but, second with nutrition and strengthening our bodies. I would love to talk more!!! Blessings, Katrina <3